A Touching Experience with Tonia

A Touching Experience with Tonia

On February 13, 2016, I unexpectedly left the Hannibal library early at about 4:30 p.m. and I went to Walmart to do my usual Saturday grocery shopping and, for the second time in Walmart, I ran into my favorite phlebotomist, Tonia, who was in a checkout line and she allowed me to stand in line with her as she waited to be checked out. I told Tonia that I had had two questions that I'd been wanting to ask her. But first, I asked Tonia, "Do you know how long you and I have known each other?" Tonia thought for a moment and replied, "I'd say a little over 6 years," which very much astonished me as that was exactly right. I had been diagnosed with leukemia in the Fall of 2009. I asked her, "Did you use an event to tie that to?" Tonia replied, "No, that was just what it seemed like." I continued, "Well, during those 6 years---and this has been very special to me---you and I have had what I call.......'moments', causing Tonia to laugh a bit embarrassingly. I added, "I'd say that you and I have had about 3 or 4 'moments'. My question is: Are there any other male patients that you have had similar 'moments' with?" Tonia thought for a few seconds and replied, "No, because......." I interjected, "Because they're older?" And Tonia agreed, "Yeah, because they're older."  I finished by telling Tonia, "Well, I was just wondering whether or not you've been cheating on me," which caused Tonia to laugh very hard. 

I then told Tonia, "My second question has to do with that folder of replies (from addressees of power and authority that I have been receiving since 1991) that I had loaned you a couple of years ago. Did you read very many of them?" Tonia replied that she had read all of them. I continued, "Well, my question is: Do you think that I wrote all of those letters to those places to get these replies back from them just for the fun of it? Or do you think that there's an underlying reason?" Tonia quickly replied, "Oh, there's an underlying reason." I continued, "You didn't hesitate, at all." Tonia replied, "That's because I know you." I teasingly asked Tonia, "Do you think that you know all that there is to know about me?" Tonia answered, "I'm sure that I don't." I finished by telling Tonia, "Well, I've thought about telling you the reason why I've been conducting my letter-writing effort." 

By this time, Tonia had finished her checkout of her purchases and then she shared with me some very shocking news: Tonia told me that she has been diagnosed with multiple sclerosis and has been going to St. Louis for treatment. And she added that she was blind in one of her eyes. In my shock, I told her, "No!" Tonia then talked to her daughter on her cell phone who was picking her up from Walmart and then, with Valentine's Day the following day, I gave Tonia a warm hug and I wished her an early Happy Valentine's Day and we went our separate ways. 

The following Tuesday, February 16, 2016, happened to be my 6 month checkup for my leukemia at the cancer center (in which I received a good report) and I saw Tonia briefly but she was so busy that all we could do was say "Hi" to each other in passing. After my checkup, I left with a nurse a manila folder of materials that fully explain and describe what I euphemistically call "My Second Vocation in Life" and at the end of my one page handwritten letter to Tonia, I wrote: 

"Always remember that many, many people are pulling for you and see you as a very special and very sweet and very beautiful woman."

My Heart to Heart Talk With Tonia

My Heart to Heart Talk With Tonia

After seeing my cancer doctor this past Monday, August 17, 2015, on my way out, I ran into my favorite phlebotomist, Tonia (who I have waxed eloquent twice before on this blog page), who I discovered was suffering from a hoarse voice which she attributed to secondhand smoking. I took her aside from the other women employees of the cancer center and I told Tonia that seeing her in this condition makes me want to rescue a beautiful damsel in distress and I told her of how I've had that deep longing since I was a young adolescent, seeing the beautiful actress Susan Hayward play the part of a wrongfully executed woman in the movie, "I Want To Live!".

I then told Tonia that there was something that I'm surprised that I didn't tell Tonia when I ran into her at Walmart several months earlier and I told her, "I guess it's because I was overcome by your aura," which made Tonia smile and laugh and quite obviously happy.  I told her that it was when I saw Dr. Bari about a year earlier and at the end of my examination, we were talking about Tonia and that Dr. Bari agreed with me that Tonia was very good at her job. I continued, "I told Dr. Bari that out of all of the women who I've ever met, that you (Tonia) are the most feminine......of them all. From Day #1, you've just exuded femininity."

Tonia gushed and smiled and twisted her body a little from side to side, obviously very pleased by my compliment and Tonia told me, "I'm just a Girlie Girl."

And I laughed and I told Tonia, "That's just about right."

A *Moment* That I Shared With My Special Phlebotomist

 Here is a followup story about my favorite phlebotomist, Tonia.



On February 9, 2015, I went in to the cancer center to give a sample of my blood one week before I saw my cancer doctor concerning my Stage 1 leukemia (CLL). My favorite phlebotomist, Tonia (who I ended my 2012 Christmas Letter with a very notable story about), took my blood this day and as I settled into my chair, I told her how I very much enjoyed running into her at Walmart a couple of months earlier and had a nice long visit with her. I then told Tonia, "I hope that you don't mind me saying this, but, and I know that you're always attractive, but that night at Walmart, you were particularly beautiful. I don't know if you remember how you had your eyes done that night, but your eyes were really deep!" And as I finished my sentence, my eyes gazed intently into Tonia's eyes (with Tonia looking down, hovering just over me) and we looked very intently into each other's eyes for several long seconds. After I looked away from Tonia's beautiful eyes, she told me rather sheepishly, "Oh, you're embarrassing me."

I also told her that it was very nice of her to initiate giving me a hug when we said our 'Goodbyes' at Walmart and that that was the most special hug (outside of my family, as I would later defensively explain to my daughter, Holly) that I had received in many years. I told Tonia, "You know, though, there was one 'downside' to that hug you gave me." Tonia laughed and replied, "Oh, what's that? Because I had to leave?"  I told her, "Yes, I had to let you go. You're right on it."

An Amusing Story Involving My Favorite Phlebotomist

I shared the following amusing experience with Jane in an e-mail last Wednesday, July 11, 2012, that I thought was worth passing along:


Yesterday (July 10, 2012), I had an amusing experience giving a blood sample for testing before I see my cancer doctor next Monday, who I see once every four months. A very sweet and attractive and kind (and very married!) woman in her late 30s named Tonia was the phlebotomist who drew my blood and we've always had a rather teasing, flirting relationship. And in my many, many years of "doctoring" which included MANY pokes for blood draws, Tonia is, by far, the least painful of them all---sometimes she can do it without causing any pain at all. One thing about Tonia is that she always looks like she just stepped out of a beauty shop, her hair always looks very good.

I actually had Tonia do a blood draw the day before on Monday, but she called me yesterday afternoon to tell me that the Monday sample didn't get sent off in time which led to clotting and, thus, useless, so she very apologetically asked me to come in again to have another blood sample drawn. I told her not to feel bad and I'd be glad to make the ~8 mile out-of-my-way round trip to do it again. When I sat down for the blood draw (which is in a rather confined area that connects the lab with the large commonway of the cancer center), Tonia once again told me she felt bad about my needing to come back out again and I once again told her that she shouldn't since it wasn't her fault, at all. To try to express a rather delicate point, I carefully explained to Tonia, "I hope that you take this the right way, but if you were like a 300 pound Russian woman weightlifter named Helga,..........then it would be a little different."

Tonia smiled and I could tell that she felt flattered and Tonia gently replied, "I think that I know what you're trying to say."

As she eased the needle into the pit of my right elbow, just seconds later, a woman who I'd say was late 50s--early 60s, with very short brown and grayish hair, who was a bit overweight and on the short side, walked out of the adjoining lab and right behind Tonia and she deadpanned, "If it was me taking his blood, he probably wouldn't want to come back out here," and she kept on walking.

Tonia and I burst out laughing and I could tell that Tonia was a bit embarrassed and after our laughter subsided, I asked Tonia, "Do you think that'll get around?" and Tonia replied, "I wouldn't be surprised."